False and Shameless Advertising

If I were a lawyer with too much time on my hands, instead of a computer geek with too much time on my hands, I would sue Dell for false advertising.

You have probably seen the ad by now. A guy is lying in his bed talking on the phone with a Dell technical support rep. The guy wants to make sure they are always there, and the rep assures him that they are.

That isn’t false advertising, as far as I know. The part that’s false is that the Dell tech support person speaks perfect English. If you have ever dealt with Dell’s tech support people, you know that is not the case.

I’ve had more than a few occasions to call Dell’s tech support in the last six weeks, and I have yet to speak to anyone who does not have a very thick, middle Eastern or Indian accent. During every conversation, everything the tech support person says has to be repeated twice before I can make it out.

The most comical part of these service calls, however, is when the tech support person introduces themselves as “Jack” or “Amy” or, my personal favorite, “Sabrina.” If “Sabrina” is her real name, then I’m the Dalai Lama. I suppose it’s like phone sex in that regard, only less satisfying (I’m guessing here. I have no personal experience in this area. So far as you know. :)

I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much, as my problems have all eventually gotten fixed, but it irritates me that service calls take three times longer than they should.

On the shameless advertising front (is “shameless advertising” redundant?), McDonalds is offering rap and hip-hop artists $5 every time a song mentioning “Big Mac” is played on the radio.

Some rap and hip-hop songs have included other brand names, like Courvoisier, Dom Perignon, Porsche and Bentley. Add “Big Mac” to that list and we can play a Sesame Street game: (go ahead and sing along) Which of these things is not like the others? Which of these things isn’t the same?

Those brands get mentioned because the artists are bragging about their riches. How many are going to brag about their Big Macs?

The sandwich, that is.

The answer is none, and if any of them tried it, they’d get laughed out of the rappers union. Also, can you imagine a radio station playing that song? Only if they wanted to stick Mickey D’s with the bill, but I doubt it would get played much if that’s the only motive.

I can't see how anything good comes from this.