Mother's Day Cooking

A couple of days ago, I promised to share recipes if my cooking on Mother's Day did not cause any fatalities. I figure if anyone was going to die, they probably would have already, so these recipes should be OK.

There's nothing ground-breaking or terribly difficult in here, or I couldn't have done it.

Chicken Piccata

2 lbs chicken breast, sliced or pounded thin (scallopine style)
flour to dredge
4 T Olive oil
12 T butter
a few cloves of minced garlic
1/2 c dry white wine
juice of one lemon
1 c chicken broth

heat oil and 4T butter in skillet on high heat
dredge chicken and fry until brown - remove chicken to serving platter
reduce heat to med-high
add remaining butter
saute garlic
add wine and reduce
add lemon juice and chicken broth and reduce some more
spoon sauce over meat
garnish with parsley and/or thinly sliced lemon.

Fettuccine Alfredo

1 lb fettuccine
1 pint heavy cream
1 stick (8T) unsalted butter
a few cloves of minced garlic
1 c parmigiano reggiano cheese, grated

cook pasta in well-salted water
melt butter in saucepan and saute garlic
add cream and heat to boil
stir in cheese
toss sauce with pasta
garnish with more cheese and/or parsley

Not too tough, eh? I also made a ceasar salad, including the dressing with the raw egg, and still, nobody died.

I also tried to make bananas foster, but I had a lot of problems.

The first problem was trying to use an electric skillet, which just didn't heat consistently enough to dissolve the brown sugar in the butter.

Even using a regular skillet, I had problems because there just isn't enough liquid to dissolve the brown sugar until you actually try to foster some bananas.

Then, I had problems setting the alcohol on fire. No, the Fire Department wasn't called. I couldn't get it to ignite. I used more liquor the second time and it lit, but had a very strong rum flavor. Not that there's anything wrong with that! Eventually, I ended up with something edible, but I'm not sure you could call it bananas foster.

At least we didn't end up at the Kwik 'n' Krappy's.

Roast Pork – Sort of

As I mentioned in my profile, one of my interests is cooking. That’s a relatively new interest for me, which was born out of watching the Food Network on TV. In particular, I like Good Eats with Alton Brown and Iron Chef. I used to joke that the only thing I could cook was Spaghettios (recipe: open can; eat with spoon). That may still be true, but after watching professional chefs on the Food Network make things look so easy, I’ve tried some other things and, as you might expect, had some mixed results.

Last night was one of those things. My wife suggested cooking a pork loin roast (bone in) on the grill, which I’ve never done before. In fact, I had never done anything requiring indirect heat. It turned out surprisingly good – so good that I thought I would share the recipe with you.

Ingredients:
Pork loin roast – bone in
Wife or alarm clock
Whiny kids
Potato chips

Prep time: 30 minutes, not counting nap.
Cook time: 2 hours, 18 minutes. Approximately.

1. Take a nap. Have your wife wake you around 3:30 and ask you if you’re going to start the coals. An alarm clock will do if you don't have a wife.
   
2. Start the coals in the grill.
   
3. Kids start to complain that they’re hungry.
   
4. When coals heat up, move them away from the middle of the grill. Put a drip pan with some water in it in the middle of the grill, surrounded by the coals.
   
5. Panic because it looks like you used about half as many coals as you need.
   
6. Add more coals.
   
7. Put the roast on the grill, fat side up.
   
8. After about 45 minutes, check the roast. Doubt to yourself that it’s cooking fast enough, but turn it over anyway.
   
9. Kids complain that they’re hungry again. Give them a few potato chips.
   
10. After another 45 minutes, stick a meat thermometer into the roast. Wonder if the thermometer is working correctly or if the inside is still so cold that the needle doesn’t move.
    
11. Kids complain that they’re still hungry. Tell them to quit whining and set the table (in case the roast ever gets ready).
    
12. Give up on the grill. Put roast in roasting pan and into cold oven set to 400 degrees.
    
13. After about half an hour, take roast out, stick in meat thermometer. Needle should barely move.
    
14. Bedtime is rapidly approaching. Kids complain that they’re still hungry. Send them to their room.
    
15. Give up on the oven. Put roast in microwave for 5 minutes at 70% power.
    
16. Stick thermometer in roast. Needle should move slightly, but still not reach temperature scale. Start doubting again whether the thermometer works correctly.
    
17. Put roast in microwave for 6 more minutes at 70% power.
    
18. Stick thermometer in roast. Needle should start to offer signs of hope, but it’s not done yet.
    
19. Put roast in microwave for 7 more minutes at 70% power.
    
20. Cover with foil and let sit for a few minutes before serving.
    

We didn’t season or marinate the meat, but you certainly could. It actually turned out pretty good. It tasted smoky, like it had been grilled, but the meat was still pretty tender.

Today, for Mother’s Day, I’m cooking for the mothers (my wife, my mom and my mother-in-law), who no doubt are wondering if I’ll screw up again and end up taking them out. That could be a problem, since about the only place we could get into on Mother’s Day without a reservation is the Kwik 'n' Krappy’s (“Burgers on a stick!”). If it turns out good, I may share those recipes here.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you mothers! (From someone who is often called a mother)