Here's what baseball should do. They should send the Cubs - the entire very-bad-word franchise - down to AAA and not let them come back until they win that league's championship.
No, I have a better idea. Let the Cubs play the first two months of the season. Then, make them stop and play in the College World Series. Then, if they win that - which they won't because it's against the very-bad-word law for them to win anything with the name "World very-bad-word Series" in it, including the very-bad-word Little League World Series - they come back to the major leagues and try to get into those playoffs. If they don't, they pack up and go home so they don't waste another entire very-bad-word year.
This year's Cubs' playoff MVPs are: Henry Blanco, Bobby Howry, Reed Johnson and Ted Lilly. Why? Because they never got into a very-bad-word game. Can't very-bad-word up on the very-bad-word bench.
I have another use for all those very-bad-word "W" flags. Wipe.
Very-bad-word! Very-bad-word! Very-bad-word! Extremely-bad-word!
There. I feel better now.